Monday, November 6, 2017

Public Apology: "My Truth" is what I'm Living in





About a week or so ago, a friend of mine called and asked how I was doing and I matter-of-factually said "I am great" and started rattling off all of the great things that are happening in my music career.  After I finished, he said, "all of those things are wonderful Jayna, but how are you?" and then he texted me the picture above.  He said those eyes say something other than "I am great" at first, I  defended my pic, cuz, I like it and yah know I got some compliments about it...LOL... Anyway... I really thank God for friends like this because they are the ones that seem to know us better than we know ourselves. You know those people when you see them you just can't pretend with anymore because they know the real you?  So 2 1/2 hours later, I hung up the phone feeling overwhelmed with emotion and frustration because I am going through the process of closing another chapter in my life. and, I knew I had lied to my friend when I said "It's good though".  Later that day, Someone else told me to "Stop blaming myself for my mistakes and failed relationships"

Which leads me to this burning desire to make this Public Apology.  You see, my heart and my mind have raged an all out war against each other, which almost had me renting a room in the "sunken place" I was trying my hardest to show strength and to prove that Boss Lady's don't show emotions and feelings and these things that I have tucked away inside have not somehow shown in my eyes (the windows to my soul)... While the details of my fight are extremely personal, I do realize now that my strength does not lie inside of someone else.

Now I may be guilty of accepting (or overlooking) things because I feared the alternative, I do know that I have no control over the actions and choices of others...and even-more-so It is not my fault.

So, here it goes...Jayna Blackwell...I apologize - I am sorry for blaming me, myself and I!!!

Yes, the desire to apologize to myself had taken over... and for quite sometime I just knew somehow my career/my heart/my love/my choices were to blame... Yeah, I know...some of you were expecting something else....

BUT

For anyone else out there that feels as if the toxic situation or people in your life are that way because of something you did,  you couldn't be further from the truth.

Now, there's a lot going on in our world today...Natural disasters/Terrorist shootings/Madness in the White House, etc.....But, what I know right now today is true it was true yesterday, last week and will be true tomorrow and all of the other tomorrow's after that...."Tomorrow is not promised to any of us" and life is just too short to go through it wasting time not living in our truths.  Be true to yourself and those in your life.  Let everyone you care about know how you feel...If tomorrow never comes for you or them....You both will know the real authentic truth.

I Love You and that is as real as it gets!!!   Thank you for your love and support!!!



For updates and other news, check me out at C-TownRecords and also Reverbnation.

Your love and support is what drives me and that support for artists like me comes in many ways:


DOWNLOAD: If you like it, buy it. For less than a cup of coffee/pack of gum/bottle of water - get my new single "That's My Song" https://itunes.apple.com/…/thats-my-song-feat…/id1260382849…

STREAM: Add me to your Playlists (Spotify/Pandora/Tidal) https://open.spotify.com/artist/3M06iWxDM54IajGR6sHg25

REVIEW: If you like it leave a comment

REQUEST: Call/email/visit the website of your local Radio Stations and request "That's My Song Ft. Ken'Yaun by Jayna Blackwell

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